Okay I got your message

Okay I got your message
I understand it dear
You don't want to get married yet
You've made that very clear

I got your answer honey
To my heartfelt request
The answer is a "No, dear."
"I think waiting would be best."

Okay so that's your answer
And so you'll know then why
I do not like to ask for things
Rejection makes me cry.

I'm tired of the answers
When No is all they say.
I'm tired of it dear Sam Bear
And hurt yes, hurt today.

But as it always is with men
You do what you want to do
I thought this would be different
Since I thought you wanted me too..

I'm sorry for confusion
On this issue now I'm clear
My feelings on this matter
Are just not in the equation's here.

I thought you understood some things
But now I see you don't
I will not bother you about it
You will see I won't

When you come to visit
Or should I say if you do.
I'll treat you like a friend of mine
but that is all I'll do.

I will not bathe your body
In lovely scented oil
I will not try to tempt you
Or tease your blood to boil.

I will be like a virgin
I'll behave and so will you
You've left me no other option
See your choice has consequences to.

I have told you how I feel about it
More than once I know.
And so you'll be a gentleman
Everywhere we go.

It will be just like a punishment
I know it will be hell
But you know my conditions
Yes, you know them very well.

I do not understand it
But that's okay it seems
I'll just have to have you
But only in my dreams

In my dreams you are so anxious
To be with me in bed
But in reality honey
You are running away instead

So go on and keep on running
When you're done and when you're through
We'll do some serious talking
About what I'm going to do.

You're a dear and sweet and kind man
I still love you that is true.
But I've learned another lesson
About asking things of you.

It's okay for me to ask them
It's okay for me to say
It's okay for me to question
But you expect me to obey

No compromise is forthcoming
The request has been denied
No you will not be my bridegroom
No I will not be your bride

At least not in the near future
Not this month at any rate
Maybe someday in the future
Down the road we'll set the date.

Maybe in November
When the snow begins to fly
Maybe in December
Before Christmas we will try.

Or maybe in the Springtime
After winter snows are through
Maybe you'll be ready
Not so scared nor worried to.

"It really doesn't matter now."
"You know I love you honey."
"Well marry when the time is right,
When we both have some money."

All I can say to all of that
Is I will try my best
To not let all this break my heart
Cause of my denied request.

It all boils down to one thing
My feelings sometimes count
But if they aren't the same as yours
Then I'm going to strike out.

Sometimes I'm slow in learning
Sometimes I'm stubborn too
But now I'll add "Fool" to the list
Cause I'm in love with you.

Fool cause I thought it would be different
Fool cause I thought you knew
Fool cause it was so important
You must listen but also do.

Okay Mister in Los Angeles
You've made your point with me.
You aren't ready for commitment
You still hanker to be free.

When you feel you are available
You can start the process again
You can ask me if I'll marry you
But Sammy until then,

I think it's best you understand
That how you feel for inside
Is not a tenth as sad as me
My heart is breaking wide

I respect your need for space here
I respect your need for time
I'll give you plenty of it
No reason and no rhyme

My tears I'll shed alone now
But it's okay you know
I'm used to shedding tears like this
Eventually they'll go

I'll wipe my eyes and blow my nose
I'll be just fine again.
Until the nighttime then descends
And tears will fall like rain.

I guess I should be used to it
I guess that I should know.
Loving a man is joy and pain
It forces you to grow.

I wanted so much to be with you
And even still I do.
I cannot stop the way I feel
I have been hurt by you.

Relationships are difficult
Because when you trust and feel
It turns your guts all inside out
You wonder what is real.

I hope you understand me now
When I tell you all of this
I have no one to hold me here
I have no one to kiss.

I have two empty arms, a heart
So sore it feels just pain
Maybe someday I'll have enough faith
To ask something of you again.

But not in the near future..
Not when feeling like I do
I know I have been impatient
To become a Mrs. too

Was it terrible to want you
Is my sin to be my fate
That I'll wait a lifetime hoping
And I'll just keep having to wait.

Is happiness forthcoming
Or is waiting for it all
Just the promise in the future?
Behind the mountain over the wall.

I have tried to help you understand
To build with you a trust
I guess I haven't done that yet.
For me it's more than lust.

I'm going now to do some things
To try and settle down
I have a lot to do these days
I'm going to go to town.

I'm going to try and just forget
I ever asked for more
More than you can give me
Don't ever ask for me

Don't ask for more when it's important
Don't ask for more my friend
Cause you'll just get hurt and disappointed
And frustrated in the end.

Just take what life will give you
Be content with what you've got
Life is full of challenges
That is what experience has taught.

How to get past disappointments
How to heal and how to mend
How to deal with when your heartbreaks
How to guard and to defend.

Have a good day and work hard dear
I will try and do the same
Someday soon I will be able
Not to cry when I speak your name.

But you've hurt me for the record
And I hate how I now feel
I hate feeling all this heartache
But I'm afraid it's all too real.

You've lost a lot of points here
You'll have to start again
In fact you're in the minus
At least a minus ten

So Mr. Sam is going to have
No loving from the CAT
But that's no big deal to him
He's just fine with that.

He's the Man he tells his honey
And she loves him that is true
But he doesn't understand the way
She thinks or feels Do you?

I wrote this long poem
To try and let you know
That I'm not just disappointed
I am crushed, you've dealt your blow

Sometimes words are more cruel
Than fists cause what they say
Come back for years to haunt you
In your nightmares kept at bay.

I am sure I will get over it
I am sure someday I can
But some days I feel like cursing fate
That God created MAN

I know you say you love me
But when your love is tried
You run away so fast and hard
Your fear just makes you hide

Well you don't have to worry
I'll not ask or beg again
But how can I have faith in you
When you've hurt me yet again?



(Sorry Honey)